There is a God

A little girl asked her mother: “How did the human race appear?” The mother answered: “God made Adam and Eve; they had children; and so was all mankind made.”

Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered: “Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”

The confused girl returned to her mother and said: “Mum, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and my father said they developed from monkeys?”

The mother answered: “Well, Dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family, and your father told you about his.”

- Unknown

Dirt

A group of scientists got together and decided that mankind no longer needed God, so they picked one scientist to go tell him. "God" the appointee said " we've decided we no longer need you, we can clone people, cure disease and create life, so we don't need you anymore, please leave us alone."

God listened to the scientist and then said "Very well, but first lets have a man making contest, doing it as I did back when I created Adam."

"Sure no problem," said the scientist, bending down to scoop up at handful of dirt.

"No, No, No" God admonished, "Get your own dirt!”

- Unknown